That kind of Day

HA! I re-read my title and just thought to myself: "It seems like ALL your days are becoming 'that kind of day'" ;-) True, very very true... but with a very smart, spirited boy and a reflux baby girl (which, her reflux is getting a lot lot better - WHOO!!!!), every day is bound to be crazy.  HA! Even if baby girl didn't reflux and was a normal baby, my days would be crazy.  For it's not the baby that creates the havoc - it's the TODDLER!!!!!!

12:30 pm - Toddler enters the world of nap time, Baby sleeping, MOPS just ended - Mama is HAPPY
4:15   pm - Toddler leaves the world of nap time, Baby is AWAKE, MOPS is a distant memory - Mama is frustrated
6:00 pm - Toddler and Mama leave Target - Mama is flustered
8:00 pm - Toddler enters the world of bedtime, Baby asleep - Mama staring blankly at the wall

3 hours.  3 hours is how long I fought Cy to take a nap, while rocking baby and getting laundry done.  In those 3 hours, I left my post at his door (sitting to make sure he doesn't leave) 3 times.  Once - he threw all his toys at the walls and emptied his toy box.  Second time - he emptied a container of soap all over his bed, animals, and pillow (I must say, his room has never smelled better!).  Third time - He made his wicket laundry basket into a stepping stool so that the lights could be turned on.  3 hours.  After 3 hours - I give up, willingly.

What better way to relieve stress and tension than to sit at home, chiling.  But NOOOOO there is nothing to eat and pull ups for night time sleep are out and wipes are out and my floss is out.  To Target we go.  I'm sure everyone at Target would vouch for this - but we left everyone with a very very pleasant shopping experience as they were able to listen to the kids' as they strengthened their vocal cords - the ENTIRE TIME (30 minutes of screaming from both kids - NOT fun!). 

Finally home, I start catching my breath and relaxing again - only to find Cy filling his pant in the living room.  It's funny how their face is always so angelic and innocent as they do something that they aren't supposed to be doing.  I get him showered and cleaned - NOT an easy task by any means.  Then clean the entire bathtub so baby sisa can take a bath.  She takes a bath and I get to watch as my sweet angel kicks and has a great time in the water.  It's so quiet and peaceful watching her.  Wait! Quiet... I don't like when it's quiet! Snatch baby out, throw her in a towel, run out to the living room to find....

A 2 year old boy EMPTYING a tall can of 409 foaming carpet cleaned ALL OVER MY FLOOR (wood and carpet).  Foam is in his hair, on the floor and he has a scrubbing brush, in the middle of the foam mountain.  "Helping mama, clean floor".  Yes, thank you dear but please stop! Move away from the chemicals.  Move away from the mess.  Let's go back and take another shower while sisa screams at the top of her lungs.  :-)

It has been a very very long day.  Never a boring moment, that's for sure.  But when my heart starts hurting from all the stress... maybe I could use a 'boring' moment ;-) I constantly remind myself through this phase of trying to find my place in a world with 2 kids - that God will never, ever give me more than I can handle.  Though at one moment tonight, I felt my will giving up - I quickly straightened back up and went to 'work' again.  God will never give me more than I can handle - after the kids went down, I folded 4 loads of laundry, cleaned the entire apartment, and am finally at 10 pm sitting down for the first time since MOPS at noon.  I found strength I never knew I had.  Strength to not scream at Cy ... well not the entire day at least.  Strength to bath my child twice.  Strength to hug him and still show him love at bed time, regardless of what my heart might have been feeling.  I have become stronger from today - and tomorrow, I'll become even stronger. 

Bedtime... seriously!

As I write this wonderful blog, I am sitting on cold, tile floor.  With freezing toes & a tushy that is half asleep.  Why? Because I am trying a new technique with Cy. This transition from crib to toddler bed has been horrible! We are going on 4 weeks (I think...) and he is still no where near staying in his bed all night without constant supervision. 

I have tried the Super Nanny - walk him back to bed with no talking.  5 nights of 3+ hours of that and no let up.  I have tried spanking, yelling, threatening (ha), everything! Well, last night at 12 am - I was fed up! I marched him back to his bed, and took a toy! He gets to take a couple toys to bed each night, a blanket, sippy, and 3 yawas (paci).  Well at the end of the evening, I was sitting on the tile floor surrounded by blanket, yawas, sippys, toys and his elephant/pooh bear stuffed animals.  And guess what?! He was asleep! :-) Yay! So for nap - same concept.  I explained to him that if he gets out of bed - for each time he does, a toy/yawa/blanket/sippy gets taken away and that mama was gonna be watching guard from the hallway.  :-) Worked like a charm! 10 minutes later I was able to tend to baby sisa and have some quiet time. 

We are going on 1 hour tonight - he is still fighting it BUT has not come out of his room! Yay! I can see clearly now, the rain is gone ;-) I can see the end of the tunnel.  I pray that this is IT and for now on it only gets easier and shorter and soon he will stay PUT (because let's face it - my tushy doesn't like this tile floor much!).  So ya... that's what my evenings have been looking like for the last month... 3 hour+ of toddler fighting each and every night plus feeding baby girl plus cleaning house plus plus plus.

On another note - this mom of 2 thing is hard! With DH working soooo much lately and having school - I feel like a single mom (NOT his fault - he's exhausted too) & just really feel like most days I'm struggling just to catch a breath and have a smile.  I went to play date the other day and I just sat there like a zombie.  Those poor moms (who has just met me for the 1st time) - they probably thought I had lost it.  And in some ways, I have.  I've lost the will to try and have a conversation because honestly, I don't have enough energy to even deal with my kids right now, let alone converse with others/help others/focus on others.  That sounds horrible - I know.  I FEEL horrible that I feel this way.  But I am in "survival" mode and am doing all I can to stay afloat right now.  SO, if you see me in the next few weeks and I'm quiet and have red eyes and messy hair - don't judge. ;-) I'll get over it... just a small (ok, HUGE) bump in my wonderful life as a mom :-D

Isn't she just the CUTEST?!?!??! Looking at my beautiful children just makes ALL these trials COMPLETELY worth it! i know I'm venting - but I would NOT change my life for anything! I feel sooo very blessed to be able to stay at home and watch my children and let them drive me up-the-wall crazy :-)