Thankful In all Things

Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. I Thess 5:18. 

Thanksgiving is a time to be thankful and grateful for all that we have, given to us by Jesus.  It's hard during the holidays for me to remain upbeat and excited at times.  It just gets super lonely because DH works sooo much and when he is home, he is exhausted from all the talking and selling he did all day - that we usually take it easy.  It's hard when I see so many people spending SO much time with their families because often times, this is when most people can take a few days extra off and spend time together... where as, with DH - he is in black-out and cannot take any days off from November through December.  So today, I drove home from my friend's house and the streets were filled with cars.  Cars filled with family.  Cars filled with bags and luggage as they are able to leave town for a few days and enjoy family/vacation elsewhere. 

Thanksgiving this year will be short for us because DH has to work at 3 am for Black Friday so we have to be home and sleeping early... and then he will be working like a dog until New Years Eve.  I really do not like holidays much anymore.  I try and remember the reason for the season - but at times, like now, it gets hard.  But as I have this pity party, I pulled up that verse.  I will be reading this verse a lot this coming month.  In ALL things give thanks! So, while I feel somewhat lonely, ignored by some, exhausted with new baby, and so many other things - I want to give thanks.  For it's our positive attitude that can change our day around.  Now it's time for me to be positive and make the most out of all this!

- I am thankful for 2 beautiful children, for I could be sitting at home alone right now (actually I'd be working... but still) ;-)
- I am thankful for early Thanksgivings that we were able to celebrate with Nana and Papa instead of having no thanksgiving at all
- I am thankful for a table full of food, for many will be visiting shelters tomorrow, looking for a biscuit and gravy to get them through
- I am thankful for DH having a job, for many right now cannot find work and are trying so hard to do so
- I am thankful to be able to stay home with my children and talk to them about Thanksgiving, for some kids are at a sitters house right now, missing their mom and dad
- I am thankful for family who is willing to spend their holidays with me and my kids, for some are not fortunate enough to even have 1 person who can spend time with them


In all things give thanks! Even when things are kinda yucky and you feel down about your circumstances - you still have it SOOOO much better than sooooo many people out there - so be thankful! You are blessed beyond imagination of many.  We are not starving, we have friends, we have family, we have each other.  :-)

Thankfulness

With this movement going on throughout facebook about thankfulness - I've loved reading what everyone is thankful for but was never moved to do it myself.  Then the other day, I read a status reading something like this: "You are thankful but are you thankful to GOD"... it got me thinking.  This movement has made all of us post what we are thankful for ... because I know we are all thankful for our blessings but in the moment we typed up our thankful thoughts - did we also say a heart-felt thanks to the ONE who gave us those moments/possessions/people in our lives?

I Corinthians 10:26
"The earth is the Lord's, and everything in it."

At church on Sunday, the preacher talked about money and how money can ruin marriages.  How money is the root of all evilness and how we are to ask GOD (who actually OWNS our money) what to do with it.  And he quoted this Scripture verse.  So this verse has been on my heart today.  Everything we have belongs to the Lord.  So while I can be thankful 1,000 times over, I really need to be thankful to the Lord.  I need to be telling my thanks to HIM... while witnessing to others of how He has blessed me.  So this Thanksgiving - let's not forget to thank the ONE who gave us all our blessing and take a moment to really, truly, heart-felt and passionately thank HIM.

That kind of Day

HA! I re-read my title and just thought to myself: "It seems like ALL your days are becoming 'that kind of day'" ;-) True, very very true... but with a very smart, spirited boy and a reflux baby girl (which, her reflux is getting a lot lot better - WHOO!!!!), every day is bound to be crazy.  HA! Even if baby girl didn't reflux and was a normal baby, my days would be crazy.  For it's not the baby that creates the havoc - it's the TODDLER!!!!!!

12:30 pm - Toddler enters the world of nap time, Baby sleeping, MOPS just ended - Mama is HAPPY
4:15   pm - Toddler leaves the world of nap time, Baby is AWAKE, MOPS is a distant memory - Mama is frustrated
6:00 pm - Toddler and Mama leave Target - Mama is flustered
8:00 pm - Toddler enters the world of bedtime, Baby asleep - Mama staring blankly at the wall

3 hours.  3 hours is how long I fought Cy to take a nap, while rocking baby and getting laundry done.  In those 3 hours, I left my post at his door (sitting to make sure he doesn't leave) 3 times.  Once - he threw all his toys at the walls and emptied his toy box.  Second time - he emptied a container of soap all over his bed, animals, and pillow (I must say, his room has never smelled better!).  Third time - He made his wicket laundry basket into a stepping stool so that the lights could be turned on.  3 hours.  After 3 hours - I give up, willingly.

What better way to relieve stress and tension than to sit at home, chiling.  But NOOOOO there is nothing to eat and pull ups for night time sleep are out and wipes are out and my floss is out.  To Target we go.  I'm sure everyone at Target would vouch for this - but we left everyone with a very very pleasant shopping experience as they were able to listen to the kids' as they strengthened their vocal cords - the ENTIRE TIME (30 minutes of screaming from both kids - NOT fun!). 

Finally home, I start catching my breath and relaxing again - only to find Cy filling his pant in the living room.  It's funny how their face is always so angelic and innocent as they do something that they aren't supposed to be doing.  I get him showered and cleaned - NOT an easy task by any means.  Then clean the entire bathtub so baby sisa can take a bath.  She takes a bath and I get to watch as my sweet angel kicks and has a great time in the water.  It's so quiet and peaceful watching her.  Wait! Quiet... I don't like when it's quiet! Snatch baby out, throw her in a towel, run out to the living room to find....

A 2 year old boy EMPTYING a tall can of 409 foaming carpet cleaned ALL OVER MY FLOOR (wood and carpet).  Foam is in his hair, on the floor and he has a scrubbing brush, in the middle of the foam mountain.  "Helping mama, clean floor".  Yes, thank you dear but please stop! Move away from the chemicals.  Move away from the mess.  Let's go back and take another shower while sisa screams at the top of her lungs.  :-)

It has been a very very long day.  Never a boring moment, that's for sure.  But when my heart starts hurting from all the stress... maybe I could use a 'boring' moment ;-) I constantly remind myself through this phase of trying to find my place in a world with 2 kids - that God will never, ever give me more than I can handle.  Though at one moment tonight, I felt my will giving up - I quickly straightened back up and went to 'work' again.  God will never give me more than I can handle - after the kids went down, I folded 4 loads of laundry, cleaned the entire apartment, and am finally at 10 pm sitting down for the first time since MOPS at noon.  I found strength I never knew I had.  Strength to not scream at Cy ... well not the entire day at least.  Strength to bath my child twice.  Strength to hug him and still show him love at bed time, regardless of what my heart might have been feeling.  I have become stronger from today - and tomorrow, I'll become even stronger. 

Just some thoughts

Recent events have really got me thinking about friendship and time and family.  NOW - this is NOT necessarily about my family - but just various events I've been watching unfold...

1. If something or someone is important to you - chances are, you make time for them... no matter what! I was talking to some friends who were saying it's hard to make friends now days with families and such because everyone is so busy.  But I disagree.  I don't think everyone is "so busy", I just think they do not want to find the time to see you or be your friend or go to your events or support you.  I always try and prioritize and there has been times when I had NO time for anything but was still able to go to the hospital and hold a baby while the mama had surgery or go to a shower 1 1/2 hours away... because I found the time.  Time is what we make of it.  If something or someone is important to you - you make time for them... no matter what!

2. Family is all you have at the end! Do not burn bridges, do not spend your time hating on people or being mad.  Because time passes too quickly and things are missed and feelings are hurt.  Say your peace and move on.  Be there for each other - forever and always.  Understand.  It's easy to get caught up in our own lives that we forget that our mom/brother/sister/dad/cousin/aunt/grandma also has a life and while we are at different places or in different chapters of our lives - we need to be loving, kind, caring, empathetic, and genuine - and understand.  Support each other as much as possible.  Hug! Find time to chat at least 1x a month to say hello.  Because at the end, while you might have friends - when someone in your family passes away, you will not be sitting at their funeral going "I'm glad I was so mean to her or never tried to understand her or missed that stupid event of hers or missed out on so much of her life"... chances are, you will be sitting there, sobbing: "I wish soooo bad for just 5 more minutes with her".  So be good to your family.  Love your family.  Be there for your family.

Now with that being said - I am going to be working on that myself! I love my mom, my sister and my brothers to pieces! It's high time I start showing it... unconditionally.

The Perfect Day

As I sit here, awkwardly holding Lulu (when she has reflux, she arches back a lot... so I am holding her while her head is arched back & her body is upright and straight... see? awkward) - I am pondering my day and how absolutely awesome it was!!!

Firstly, I was awoken by a handsome lad, briiight & early.  Since it was soooo early, I grabbed all 40 pounds of cuteness & we snuggled in bed.  I noticed he was looking at the top of the curtain.  Still.  Pondering life's great wonders. "Oh Mr. Sun Sun, Bright & shiny sun" he begins to sing.  Turns to me and says 'Sun awake now?" - See?? Life's great wonders ;-)

Well since it was so early, I decided to dress the little munchkins and head to the mall.  They have a team that practices hockey in the Mall on their Ice Rink and we want to create a passion for Hockey in Cy - so we are starting young! I head to Panera first, pick up some breakfast sandwiches and decaf tea (Still trying to keep all sugar and caffeine out of my diet... minus a few slips here and there) and we sit by the rink, watching the guys practice hockey. 



Yes, he was VERY excited!!

Then we headed off to church - we have a great marriage series going on right now and my sweet husband took his lunch WAY early (6 hours early) and came to church with me so we could be there together and learn together.  So awesome!!!

Cy took a wonderful nap, we ran to Target and got a frozen pizza for dinner because mama forgot to grocery shop on Friday (oops) & we sat at home.  Relaxing.  Hugging.  Watching Veggie Tales.  Playing with Baby Sisa.  Unloading salt on the pizza (cy! ... no I wasn't happy at that moment ha ... wait till daddy eats that piece and no, I didn't tell him - thought it would be more fun this way, ha!).  Building Blocks.  Waiting for daddy to come home.

At bed time, we read "Goodnight Moon" and my genius boy almost read the entire book BY HIMSELF! No kidding.  Ash and I just sat there and kept kissing on him - I am soooo proud of him! He then made sure we all prayed to Jesus & sang "Jesus Loves me".  Then it was off to lala-land for the Prince who has given my life soooo much meaning.  So much love.  So much pride.  So much.... everything.


New Week

Tomorrow starts a new week!!!! I am super excited! I have big plans everyone! Big plans! Ok well not really... I don't think I have more than 2 things on the calendar - which excites me! I think I'll be a hermit and stay in with Cy and Lu, cuddling and loving on my babies!

But I do have some goals for this week:
- ENJOY Church tomorrow - great sermon coming up about marriage - I cannot cannot wait and Ash is taking his lunch early so he can go with me - YAY!
- ENJOY my sweet babies - They are only this young for a little bit... so I'm going to hug and kiss on them as much as humanly possible :-)
- ENJOY the weather - it's been a nice 70-some degrees - so I'm gonna be out a LOT with my boy
- ENJOY setting up Christmas Tree with my baby boy and daddy - should be loads of fun! It's his 1st tree that he'll remember
- ENJOY the quiet and stillness of a "boring" week :-)

I hope y'all have a wonderful and enjoyable week as well!

Dust go to sleep...

A couple nights ago my dear sweet Lulu was up every hour.  Seriously, every. single. hour.  And to throw in some "Make sure you really didn't get any shut-eye" into the mix, Cy also woke 2 times :-)

Well, I then had an entire day of cleaning to get ready for my amazing Stop'N'Shop.  So, to the day of cleaning while having a sore throat and runny nose - WHOO! Stop'N'Shop was fun and long :-) Bed - nope! Baby up... DH grumpy... Mama tired.  It turned out to be a long evening of "who is taking baby" and "what are we missing, why won't she sleep... why can't she sleep... why is she still crying... WHAT do we do?!??!"

Well, this morning I was feeling very very low about everything.  I mean, let's be honest - when you are getting MAYBE 4 hours of sleep a night for the last 4 months and virtually ZERO breaks each day because kids do NOT nap together (Well at least a reflux baby doesn't... she doesn't hardly nap unless being held) - spirits are running on fumes.  I am running on fumes.  Enter Whitney! :-)

She came to pick up her stuff from the night before (Check out her website) & while she is packing up and I am nursing - she says something, I respond, and she turns around to me sobbing.  Because lets face it - sometimes all we need to do is cry.  And that's what I did.  I cried.  About my feelings of failing as a mom.  Because I cannot seem to make my sweet angel happy.  Because Cy is so affected by her screaming all the time.  Because my marriage is affected by the constant pull for attention with a reflux baby and a needy toddler.  Because I am EXHAUSTED beyond anything I've ever felt.  Because I'm getting sick.  Because I just want to be a good mom, a good wife, and good friend, a good daughter to God.  Nothing is ever enough.  I am always writing lists of things I need to get better at.  Maybe if I was a better friend, I'd have better friends or maybe if I love Cy more, he'd stop hitting other kids and Lulu or maybe if I just give myself 5 more minutes of cleaning - the house would be cleaner.  It's never ending.  Go look at my mirror in my dining room right now - I have a "THings to get better at" and a LONG list that I wrote out during nap time. 
- Do more crafts with Cy
- Be sure to brush Cy's teeth 2 times a day
- Learn more about Arbonne (This is actually a fun one!)
- Make more time to read the Bible
- Get calendar and schedule 1-on-1 time with Cy, Lu, DH, and God
- Make cleaning schedule and stick to it
- Make food journal and figure out WHY Lulu is refluxing still

See... never good enough.  And while rocking a screaming baby girl for 1 1/2 hours tonight while running toddler back to bed every 5 minutes... again - what am I doing wrong... what am I missing.  But then I got on my blogger and read my friend's blog and she sent everyone to this link, and it touched my heart.  I am breathing easier.  Not completely better.  I still need to let go and let God... but I am breathing better.


Mother, oh Mother, come shake out your cloth


empty the dustpan, poison the moth,

hang out the washing and butter the bread,

sew on a button and make up a bed.

Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?

She's up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.



Oh, I've grown shiftless as Little Boy Blue

(lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).

Dishes are waiting and bills are past due

(pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo).

The shopping's not done and there's nothing for stew

and out in the yard there's a hullabaloo

but I'm playing Kanga and this is my Roo.

Look! Aren't her eyes the most wonderful hue?

(lullaby, rockaby, lullaby loo).



The cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow,

for children grow up, as I've learned to my sorrow.

So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust go to sleep.

I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep.





by Ruth Hulburt Hamilton